It Needs Harmony

Hello from a Sunday of uncertain weather,

It’s been an interesting winter of weather here in North Central Pennsylvania. Earlier in January, we received the most snow in a storm that I’ve experienced in 16 years. Additionally, we also experienced an 18 day period where the temperature did not get above freezing. That is atypical for here. Certainly, the temperature in my childhood area is much colder. I remember a period in seminary in the Twin Cities (and I was working for an Amoco Gas Station with both AAA and Amoco Motor Club) when the temperature did not get out of the negative numbers for almost two weeks. The last winter I was in Wisconsin I was snow blowing for Lydia after a snowstorm, and the temperature was -35 and the windchill was a -58. While it was cold, it is a much drier colder than what is typical here in Pennsylvania, but in my opinion is more manageable than single digits here in Bloomsburg. It is because the humidity that is more prevalent here creating a penetrating cold. Currently a Nor’easter is hammering the mid-Atlantic, with NYC getting their first blizzard warning in a decade and the 95 corridor will be in the middle of the storm. I am not sure what will happen here in Bloomsburg.

The past week has been busy, but productive on a number of fronts. All of my belongings are out of Tennessee, and I have a bit more sense of having some of my things versus where I have been since late September. It seems like so much longer than 6 months ago, but I am still beyond fortunate for the people I met there. The importance of getting more things in the same location is I am feeling a growing sense of balance. Second, I have worked on some significant aspects of my job, learning some really important insights into what my colleague wants as well as how they manage process. I am a process person, but feel like a novice compared to them. My continued learning about using AI to assist my work is actually beyond eye-opening. I regularly think about how differently I would teach things than I did only two years ago. The third area I find myself working on managing a sense of balance is thinking about the things I need to expend energy on and the things I should not. Understanding and practicing balance is something that is important to life in general, and it is something I have struggled with since retirement. Learning what helps one establish or feel balanced is significant to all aspects of humanity. Within balance there is a sense of harmony.

Balance is often demonstrated in places we do not realize. As many know, I have a real appreciation for the creation of wine, from planting new vines to tending them, from harvest to barreling, and from bottling to enjoying the fruit (pun intended) of what’s created. There are a couple of wine-themed movies, which I have watched multiple times since their release. The first one, titled Sideways, a movie that put Pinot Noir on the map and tanked sales of Merlot for a decade (this is true), starred Paul Giamatti and Virginia Madsen (as well as some others) and really does speak about balance or the lack thereof. The second movie, and one I have watched more often, is titled A Good Year, is a RomCom starring Russell Crowe and Marie Cotillard, and is set in Provence, France. At one point, when the main character is young and staying at his Uncle Henri’s vineyard, they watch Msr. Duflot singing to the vines he meticulously cares for. Young Max asked why, and Albert Finney, who plays Uncle Henri magnificently, notes, “He sings to the vines because the terrior needs more than sun and rain. It needs harmony; it needs balance.”The truth of that statement is not only appropriate for viticulture, it is something needed in life in general. Balance is conceptually simple, but either obtaining it or managing it is something beyond difficult. Much like the dependency on weather in a vineyard, maintaining consistency in the taste, flavor, or texture of wine from one vintage to the next depends on the winemaker to some extent, but it begins long before that. The individuals managing the blocks of vines, the careful understanding and practice of managing water (for instance in a water deficit area) or knowing when to harvest when the brix are just at peak, “allowing the fruit to be the fruit” as my enologist, Marco Cappellii noted from when I first met him is an art. Balance in life is also affected by outside influences, and managing those influences are not always an easy thing. From issues of age or location, from the reality of things like power or circumstance, finding balance in life, either daily or longer term requires some careful and thoughtful internal agency. Managing that in a way that fosters balance is something I have always struggled to do. It is something I have pondered as of late. From the time I was about 23 until I retired, most of what I did was all or nothing. There was little time or appreciation for moderation. Certainly, understanding why that was is important as well as why it affected me is actually an easy thing to ascertain. A simple sentence I heard regularly as a child: “You do not deserve to be in our house; You will never grow up to be anything.” instilled a belief that without working to prove them wrong I would become exactly that.

The reality of working hard did not kick in as a regular way of existence until I started at Dana College. By that time, in spite of doing exceptionally well in Communications and Electronics School, receiving a meritorious promotion in the Marine Corps, of qualifying for OSC and a Platoon Leaders Course, I would also be fired from a first job after returning and flunk out of college after my first foray into higher education. From losing both a brother and a grandmother within months of each other, I was lost and there was anything but balance in my life. It was a shooting on a New Years Eve, one that I was involved in, that would change my life. It was the falling for someone that taught me a great deal about making better decisions who would push me to look at some different paths. It was four other people who would put up with my trying to figure myself out during nine months and 40,000 miles that would lead me to Dana College. While it was at Dana I believe I first understood where I might go, what I might be “qualified” to do, it was perhaps the place my insecurity pushed me into a pattern of work and achievement that went beyond moderation. As I write, I am listening to the movie The Way We Were. It’s my first time seeing it. It is stunning, but it too speaks about balance. I thought it was something to finally see after the recent passing of Robert Redford. The passion of both Katie (Barbara Streisand) and Hubbell (Robert Redford) for their causes is anything but moderation. At the end of the movie, she asks, “Wouldn’t it be lovely if we were old, and we survived all of this? Everything would be easy and uncomplicated.” It is possible to make things uncomplicated? I am not convinced there is an answer that is surefire accurate. At this point in life, I am quite sure that creating a life less complicated will result in balance. I think it is possible, and perhaps for me necessary, to excel at anything I do, but also to find the ability to step aware when reasonable, to eliminate things that cause dismay or stress in my life. When there is stress, there is dissonance. There is something that create a lack of harmony.

What I find different at this juncture of my life is my willingness to step away from things, from people, or anything that causes me to feel disappointed. I see that as a step necessary to create the balance I so desire, that I so need. Toward the end of the movie A Good Year, Max, the ruthless trader, the money-making machine for his company, must decide which path to take after the inheriting of the winery of his Uncle Henri (probably spelled with a wine, but I decided to use an “i” because of the location in France). Standing in the board room with the principle partner of the firm, he sees the Rodin statue (which is the beginning picture), and there is a 200,000.00 replica of a Van Gogh. And he ponders what he wants for his life. He is required to make his own decision about balance. We are all required to make that choice, and too often figuring out what offers our best opportunity for that equilibrium is unclear. Too often we listen to others versus our own heart. Be it wine, the world, or life, happiness depends on balance. Within the balance and harmony, we find peace.

Thanks as always for reading. I wish you balance. I wish you harmony and peace.

Michael