Hello on a Friday evening,
It’s a chilly December evening, typical of the penetrating Pennsylvania cold, which I always say is worse than Wisconsin cold. It’s been a longing couple weeks as I have battled a yearly cold, which kicked me more than usual. Fortunately, I am mostly beyond it, and recently noted I am somewhat settled into my little space. I have gotten a little more semblance of control over daily life, though there are a couple major pieces on the horizon. All the clichés about life are beyond me at this point; I don’t need to hear them I just need to manage each day, each moment, each situation to the best of my ability. I think that is where my learning is just part of my daily response to whatever comes my way. The difference ways that people respond to a given situation is always something that astounds me. I am one to step back and ponder or analyze, even when it causes me some emotional distress. Others respond instantly. The consequences, both long term or short, of waiting versus an immediate response can be extreme.
The reality of human interaction is simultaneously predictable and unpredictable. We all have our personalities, our propensities, and our preferences, but when you mix different personalities or experiences into a confined space, what happens can almost always leave us speechless. What is the catalyst? What is it that prompts some to desire, to initiate drama and some to abhor or avoid it? As I age, I see how my own life has transformed to become one who wishes for a sense of serenity. And yet, there are more times than not I am closer to the antithesis of peacefulness than I would ever hope. I need to ask the simple question: why or how does it occur? After some recent events, I need to be thoughtful and examine each circumstance, looking for common denominators. In each case, I believe there is a piece in each circumstance that works as a sort of ignitor. Certainly more could be examined or questioned, but there is a degree to which that is not necessary. The question is not why it happens, it is merely that it occurs on a somewhat regular basis.
The title of this post is a motto that was a common question in an advertisement generation or more ago. It was before the recording of things was digital. It is in the long ago time of taping things with devices that used tape (e.g. reel-to-reel, cassette, or other magnetic tapes). The idea was to get a recording that sounded so authentic that went it was played, you could not hear the difference. I remember people using those words in other situations when we questioned the authenticity of something or someone. It seems too often the present world creates an atmosphere that requires a certain sense of wondering this need again. We have created a technological reality the has a questioning of anything is real, or is it merely a creation?
Perception is a powerful, necessary, and dangerous thing. As I really remind people, perception is reality for someone until proven otherwise. And when people jump to conclusions based on emotion or perception the consequence is often less than stellar. Additionally, it causes damage and division that is not easily remedied. It creates mistrust and a lack of understanding because of fear. In the last few years, and even more so in our post-COVID world, the increased level or fear has resulted in anger and resentment, which in turn has fostered resistance and rejection. What is the answer? Whatever the answer, or if there is one, I do not believe any substantial movement toward a more accepting, sensitive, compassionate world will be difficult. How can we be authentic when we are enveloped in a world of mistrust, division, or the demonization of the other? If being real only creates vulnerability, perhaps the closest thing we will ever get is Memorex.
There is a profound cost in a world that makes being authentic so dangerous. I believe we see it in all sorts of ways. From transforming our physical selves to hiding behind our profiles; from believing that anything someone does always has an ulterior motive to mistrusting anyone’s good intentions; from believing that everything written or imaged has to be AI generated, have we come to the place where we can no longer believe anything is real?
My reality has evolved over the last 16 months. What I believe to be necessary or important continued to change. Plans, even the best intentions, have been intrinsically altered, creating both a sense of uncertainty and fearfulness. In spite of trying to organize as well as be flexible, the number of times requiring a Plan B, Plan C, or maybe a letter much further into the alphabet seems likely. My reality has been to expect the unexpected. Undoubtedly, retirement has been more than simply a new experience. From managing projects to understanding the intricacies of Medicare or Supplemental Insurance, from stepping much farther outside my comfort zone than expected to experiencing a significant change in identity, what is real seems to be a moving target.
So where does that leave me as I face the end of another calendar year? 2025, the year I have reached 70 had been one that defied all expectation. And, at least in the moment, I am unsure if I believe the cumulative result falls on the positive side of the ledger. From health issues, which have always been a major element, to feeling grounded; from a constantly changing game-plan to a seemingly out-of-control world, it might seem nothing is real, and I am not sure the taped version is any better. However, as noted in a couple of recent blogs, and as I have told some of my former students who are now parents with their own families. They give me hope. From a former student in Wisconsin, who in spite of significant changes in life is an incredible parent, the student who was in my class my first year at Stout or my first year here at Bloomsburg, both who are unbelievable moms, and have beautiful marriages, or a couple here in Bloomsburg who come from profoundly different cultures, but have established a beautiful family, I glimpse what is real and what is of importance. They bless me and provide that needed sense of hope. It is those things; it is those people I need to hold on to if I am expecting our world to survive. They allow me to dream for a reality that is beneficial to all and not merely those with an unlimited income or unfettered power. And yet, it is only when we surround ourselves with a positive reality we can live authentically.
In this season of hope, peace, and love, I wish you a sense of comfort and a place where you feel that you can be real. I wonder what Mary must have thought at the annunciation? Could it be real? Could there be such miracles in her world? This song always forces me to imagine beyond what we can know or understand.
Thank you as always for reading.
Michael
thewritingprofessor55 